I know its been awhile y'all and I'm sorry I fell off the wagon. Been going through a lot of shit and I just didn't have any inspiration. The vision was clouded by tears and feelings of hate and regret. But I'm slowly coming out of the darkness and am ready to talk about life, love and the pursuit of happyness!
So I recently talked to a friend of mine whom I hadn't spoken to in going on 10 months. A little background...we have been friends for 24 years and slowly but surely grew apart and were just on two different pages! The last time we talked it had something to do with one of her boo's calling me at 2am talking about he coming over! WTF!! I ain't never talked to the boy on the phone nor does he even know where I freaking live. But I guess that was the last straw cause I never heard from her again! Got a text on my 29th birthday wishing me the best! Ha! It seems like I woke up one day and realized that we were headed in two completely different directions. I would talk about the folks I met and these fabulous events and she would talk about baby einstein and first days of school. I had no problem listening to what was going on in her life but she didn't seem all too concerned about my life. Anywho, we stopped talking completely and I didn't know how I felt about it. When I ran into her we exchanged greeting. She then proceeded to exclude herself out of the group discussion. I was a bit perturbed but whatever! I then called a friend of mine, a spiritual advisor of sorts to ask him what to do. He told me not to miss out on my blessings because she wants to be evil. So I took up a seat next to her and broke the ice. Asked her how she had been and the conversation sored from there. It didn't skip a beat and it felt like old times again. Not sure what happened to cause us to separate but glad that we talked. 24 years is a long time. Will it ever be the same I'm not sure, only time will tell.
So here's the thing, how do you know when to let a friendship go or when to make amends! If you grow apart does that mean you are forever separated? If you are on 2 completely different paths in life is it possible to be genuinely happy for the other's successes? I've heard a saying that people are in your life for one of 3 things, reasons, seasons or a lifetime. How do you know who plays what role? Why does it seem easier to forgive a lover than a friend? Do we expect more from our friends? Is that a fair expectation?
So tell me folks, have you ever regretted losing a friend?
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2 comments:
girlfriends are overrated...... quoting my mother.....
Losing a friend... well makes me think.... was she trully a friend or do we attach ourselves to those we've known a long time simply because we've know them since time began.. I mean let's be truthfull when you deemed them your bff for life you or them had no idea of who either of you would be when you grew up! You had no idea of the meaning of friendship.
I guess I lost a friend... I can say a person lost me as a friend really.... to me it was her loss. I was more of a friend / family than any of her real family or friends had been. I basically reraised the broad and her twins.. Taught them to speak potty trained them and much more.. to say the least... I think she was far to dependant on me and when I couldn't be there to hold her hand one day she was forever upset and it's been..... 5 maybe 6 years since that "friendship" ended!!! When I think back I really can't say if she was my friend however I was hers 100%...... I can say that because after the "friendship" I didn't lose anything! i wonder what she thinks.. I saw her grandma recently after many years and she said to me Bria I knowyou did alot of her and those babies and I thank you so much for that but you know how she is.... I said I know but it's okay.. I wish them the best.... I was proud that someone knew I had helped another persons life!!! i guess that was the reason for her existance in my life....
Life is a journey of growth, and naturally some friends will outgrow you or you them. Some friends will love you enough to make a conscious effort to grow with you because they love and value you just that much. Some won't. Keep living, keep learning, FORGIVE, forget, and love again.
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